Donald Trump has gotten himself into another pickle because he’s an inveterate chauvinist who has no idea how to talk to or about women. But I am nothing if not generous, so I provide him with some helpful advice.

At a recent rally, Donald introduced Arizona governor Jan Brewer by saying: “She’s an amazing person. And, you know, it’s not nice to say about a woman, but you are tough. Aren’t you? Huh? She is tough. She’s smart.”

I don’t know why Donald imagines it’s “not nice” to describe a woman as tough — and he doesn’t seem to know, either.

When asked why it is “not nice” to say that a woman is tough, Trump’s spokeswoman forwarded this comment from him: “She’s tough and she’s smart and she was a great Governor of Arizona.”

Poor Donald. So confused about how to talk to and about women.

I know it’s been awhile since last we spoke, Donald, but let me give you a little unsolicited advice.

Here are some things that are actually “not nice” to say about women:

Bimbo. Bitch. Dog. Disgusting. Slob. Fat and ugly. Extremely unattractive. The Indian. Pocahontas. Unbelievably nasty. Beautiful piece of ass. Real killers who manipulate men. Beautiful like buildings. Things to be created like buildings. “You wouldn’t have your job if you weren’t beautiful.” “Blood coming out of her wherever.” “Look at that face!”

That’s not a comprehensive list (incredibly), but you probably get the idea. After all, you have a very good brain.

Now here are some things that are nice to say to or about women:

Tough. Intelligent. Wise. Kind. Fair. Witty. Competent. Decisive. Knowledgeable. Prepared. Inspiring. Trailblazing. Generous. Compassionate. Likeable. A great candidate. Extraordinary. Validating. An excellent listener. Fundamentally honest and trustworthy. “A resolute defender of, and advocate for, reproductive justice.” Indomitable.

I could go on (and on), but I estimate that’s enough to take my point, if you’re so inclined to take it.

Oh, and I have one more last piece of advice for you, Donald, about what’s an acceptable thing to say to a woman, and this is an important one, so you might want to practice in the mirror: Madam President.